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  • May

    Stymied Again - Chris Davis Is Injured - Orioles Lose 4-0

    Written by Mike Laws

    Stymied again

    For second time in five days, O’s get complete-gamed by crafty lefty

    Orioles 0, L.A. Angels 4


    Nota bene: Being as the Orioles fell Friday night to an opposing hurler the MASN/Lowes Scouting Report termed a “changeup artist,” your faithful Hangout recapper/blogger/prose stylist thought he’d follow suit, crafting a curveball of his own (so to speak), the fruits of which effort (almost certainly misguided) follow. It should probably be noted that this night is now a very late one — every night of this blasted protracted road trip has been— and that this selfsame recapper/blogger/Eminem emulator is quickly running out of steam, not to mention more than a little punchy, and apologizes in advance for subjecting his readers to this doggerel …)


    Anyway, enough throat-clearing. On to the bullet points wicked rhymes:



    Made mincemeat of Price;

    We jumped on Josh Beckett;

    Ta heck wit’ a dump to right

    We hump it toward second.

    Having a ball

    With that ball to the wall;

    Balls to the wall, now, we’re coming ’round second

    And on in to score —

    And we’ll score a score more —

    Just give us that heat,

    And give us a second.


    The point is just this:

    “Power-arms”? Please.

    You just cannot mess with

    That sour old high cheese.

    That’s some kind of feast

    For power-bats like these:

    For Jones and Markakis

    And Big Chris and McLouth;

    For Manny Machado —

    He’ll slap your fastball around.


    But lo and behold,

    The Angels have found

    A chink in the chainmail,

    An O’s power-down.

    The junk-balling journeyman,

    Crafty southpaw of yore;

    Like Joe Saunders last Monday,

    The wily lefty du jour.

    Oh and three on the year

    Jason Vargas’s the name

    Three hits over nine

    And he’d tossed a whole game.


    So while Gonzalez was fine

    He just couldn’t hang —

    Unless you mean sliders;

    Trout took one out with a bang —

    And begged off with blisters,

    No real cause for concern;

    That’s the province of pitchers,

    For whom a hangnail means “hurt.”

    But as for big Davis,

    A knee twisted at first

    Could mean a few days’ rest;

    Could mean even worse.


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